"No! I don't know that's not how you meant it at all!" He turns abruptly, arms flung out in a helpless, very human gesture. "How am I supposed to know what you meant? It's not like you could leave a note on the refrigerator. And let's be real, Gabriel; you're not exactly an open book, even now."
"And anyway, what am I supposed to think, when time after time my closest brothers and sisters demonstrate I'm their lowest priority? You and Anna walk away, Castiel jumps ship and-and ends up throwing me away like rubbish--I just..." The rant trails off, energy oozing away slowly.
"I can't make sense of any of it. I suppose I'm being selfish. I want to understand. Maybe I'd rather it be about me not being worth enough than about something I can't even comprehend, let alone control." Slowly, he drops back into a sitting position once more, as if saying all this aloud has sapped his strength.
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"And anyway, what am I supposed to think, when time after time my closest brothers and sisters demonstrate I'm their lowest priority? You and Anna walk away, Castiel jumps ship and-and ends up throwing me away like rubbish--I just..." The rant trails off, energy oozing away slowly.
"I can't make sense of any of it. I suppose I'm being selfish. I want to understand. Maybe I'd rather it be about me not being worth enough than about something I can't even comprehend, let alone control." Slowly, he drops back into a sitting position once more, as if saying all this aloud has sapped his strength.