kore_logs | A Return to 'Normal'

Entry tags:

A Return to 'Normal'

Who: Mina, the Doctor
Where: Mina's house
When: Night of day 85
What: After the Doctor's return to sanity, he talks with Mina.
Warnings: none

After the Master had come and assisted the Doctor in repairing his shattered mind and memories, the Doctor slept nearly 48 hours. Part of that was doing his best to fix the remaining cracks and holes still exposed in his mind, and the rest was out of pure exhaustion.

That morning, Donna had laundered his clothes, and he slowly began eating again, and spent the afternoon fixing a few things that had been mostly repaired in Mina's kitchen. Donna had left in the late afternoon, after the Doctor's insistence he was fine, and he waited for Mina to wake. His pin-striped trousers had seen better days as had his button down shirt with his sleeves rolled up a bit as he sat in a chair flipping through a book in Mina's room.

Privacy? What was that to the Doctor? He had a distinctive disregard of boundaries which was rather ironic given his own in the TARDIS to his companions. Lucky for him, he had a ship that knew what they were, and kept those traveling with him, away.

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When a Kindred slept, she was, for all intents and purposes, dead. Not just dead to the world, as it was incredibly difficult to wake a sleeping Kindred. But a dead body. A lifeless hull, really. No pulse. No breath. Nothing to indicate the continued existence of--especially in Mina's case--a brilliant mind.

But the Kindred dreamed. And all that day, Mina was dreaming of the sea.

So she woke up calm.

With a soft noise that was not quite breath, Mina's body came to life. More or less. She stretched out, one leg sliding over her covers, the other beneath. She was somewhat disappointed, not to hear the sound of gulls or a busy harbor outside of her window, but it was another minute before she remembered that she was in the Kore. Still. It was a shame too. The dark had been so sweet.

Catlike, she rolled over onto her stomach, the chain around her neck getting caught in the back of her hair. She finally opened her eyes.

And let out a shriek when she realized she was not alone.

Well that was certainly unexpected!

He clapped the book shut, "It's just me!" And moved to the edge of the bed with half a laugh, "I didn't mean to startle you! Sorry, Mina." He would've reached out to touch her shoulder to reassure her, but for unknown reasons, kept his hands flat on the bed next to his sides.

Edited 2013-06-26 00:38 (UTC)

A line formed between her eyes. Apparently, she wasn't as much of a morning person as she used to be. It took her a moment to process what she was seeing. A moment that felt like it had a fatal edge. She would have to remember to fret over that later.

For now, the fog lifted and she was confronted with quite a few conflicting emotions. "You're awake," she said, expressing her surprise, interest, and, admittedly, pleasure, at this news. He'd been out for two days and nights, near as she could tell.

And it was irritating that she hadn't been able to figure why.

He sheepishly rubs the back of his neck, "Yeah, Donna said I was out for a while... I was pretty exhausted after... all of that." That was to put it lightly.

"The Master helped me, which I probably will never hear the end of..." His voice trails off as he returns his gaze to Mina, "I'm really sorry I put through that."

Mina sat up, smoothing down her nightshirt. She gestured for him to come over, patting the empty stretch of bed beside her. It was frustrating to wake up, feeling exhausted. But perhaps things would start to get back to normal. Such as it was.

Or perhaps she was turning into an optimist in her dotage.

"Who's the Master?" she asked. "Let's start with that."

He slides further into the bed, lying on his side and propping his head up, watching her. "He came before I... left?" He runs his tongue along the back of his teeth, wondering if that was the proper terminology, "He's a Time Lord, like me, but... you can't trust him." He couldn't recall if he had warned Mina before or not. There were some things that were a bit fuzzy in his memory.

"He died in my arms, refusing to regenerate. Yet somehow he did, but something went wrong and he's... well, he is much like I was just a day or two ago. He's my oldest friend and oldest enemy."

"A bit of a complicated relationship, then," she said, lying down on her own side to stay at eye level with him.

She couldn't help but marvel a little bit. He'd been so desperately far gone. And now, looking at him now, he seemed the same as ever. Perhaps a little tired. But everyone got tired in the Kore, eventually. No. This was a marked improvement. Which, naturally, made her all the more curious about this Master fellow.

But men's egos were fragile. Probably best to let it go for the moment. She would make her own inquiries later.

"How do you feel?" she asked him.

He inhales, "Relatively speaking, not bad. At least, much better than when we last spoke."

There was so much he could and wanted to say about what happened, but held back. Not for any particular reason, just he figured Mina would ask what she wanted to know or he would divulge in due time. Or maybe the bigger picture was, he wasn't certain where to even begin in what had happened to him, and part of that he didn't even know where the beginning even was.

"You alright?" Because he was concerned about her, as much as he didn't want to outright admit it.

"Fine," she lied.

She wasn't fine. She was worn out with worry and concern and confusion. There was an even greater assortment of emotions after that. She was angry with him. And desperately happy to see him. And sorry for it too. It was quite a lot to compartmentalize, so Mina decided to just skip it and lie. For the time being, anyway. After all, she still couldn't help but think of him as her patient.

And her responsibility.

Mina held up three fingers. "How many?" she teased gently, wondering if he even remembered the last time she'd asked.

"Three." He replies with a smile as he raises a hand and laces their fingers together.

"Tell me, am I the most hated man in town?" He remembered Mina telling him no one died, so at least he had that to strike off his list of things to worry about. However, he had yet to make his presence known yet, despite having a couple strange dreams about some of the people here.

Mina nodded, most solemnly. "I think some people might even hate you more than they hate me now," she said, giving his hand a little squeeze. "Nothing to worry about, though. I'm certain with your boyish good looks and your girlish enthusiasm, you'll win them over again."

Actually, Mina had no doubt of that. There might be a few outliers, here and there, but there was just something about the Doctor that made him infinitely likeable.

After all, she herself had been furious with him and now he was in her bed yet again. Of course, she'd had the benefit of seeing that he had truly suffered. It was tempting, on some level, to call it penance. But that wasn't quite the right way to look at it.

No. It wasn't fair. Punishments ought to fit the crime.

"Girlish enthusiasm?" He might sound offended by that notion, but really was more amused than anything, and caused him to grin even more. "You've been around Donna too long, though I believe she said I was more like a puppy."

It gave him hope, though, if both Mina and Donna reasoned he'd be forgiven, then he'd gladly accept that. And Mina was right, there most likely will be people who won't forgive him, and that was acceptable as long as he wasn't persecuted and hunted down. Though, Mina had said she wasn't well liked here, and he had yet to see anything bad happen as a result.

"Girlish," she said stubbornly. "But you can be a girlish puppy, if you'd like. I'll get some ribbons for your hair. I'm sure there are some in your...I mean, Anna's room."

Or did she? Anna was gone. Why was that so difficult for her to remember?

Well. No matter.

She exhaled softly through her nose, examining him again. "What happened?" she asked.

"I don't think I've ever been called 'girly' past the Master's insults." He mused outloud, until Mina's next question.

His features darken slightly, "At what point?" His madness and obsession with escaping? How his plan failed? Or when he was captured? He'd like to point out no one truly tried to stop him, though he had given false hopes of escaping this place and could understand how people justified his recklessness with the hopes of going home.

She shrugged up one shoulder, in a gesture that might have passed for 'cute' on a younger, prettier girl. Mina herself was just trying to keep him from feeling threatened. "All of it," she said quietly, her tone matching her soft movements.

Lightly, she ran her thumb along the side of his hand. It had all happened so fast and been so confusing, when he vanished. And in the lull, she hadn't tried to put all the pieces together. Then he was back and all was frantic again. Somehow, she was reminded of the phrase, 'Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.'

And those who failed to learn history correctly? Well. They were simply doomed.

Tragically, he fell in both categories. He had been in plenty of situations where he begged for people to remember history and how the situation wouldn't play out as they had hoped. Then time was wibbly-wobbly at best and sometimes history didn't play in the right order, yet the fixed points in time remained and all he could do was watch, as a good Time Lord should.

The Doctor was not a good Time Lord. The Master was right, Gallifrey and the high council would turn in their graves to know the last of their kind was survived by him, as much as he didn't want to admit it.

"I thought I could get us out... Theoretically, my calculations and plan were fail proof. This place," He pauses to lick his lips, "I don't know who is running the show, but they're very powerful. I've never been trapped like this before and for this long. They're unlike anyone I've dealt with before. Stronger than the Daleks, the Cybermen... all of them."

He grows quiet for a moment, as his gaze focused on their hands together, "I knew the nanosecond the barrier was penetrated, something was wrong, but it was too late. I couldn't stop... and then I was punished for it." He didn't know how he wasn't regenerated or forced to. It seemed the obvious punishment for such a crime, as it often was, even by his own people.

The prophecy still held true... Was his regeneration a fixed point that couldn't be tampered with? "I don't know what they were looking for, and I don't remember any of what happened, but what I had gone through should never, ever be experienced by anyone." Ancient and forever, he was once considered that, and they ripped through his mind, destroying any and all barriers that separated his memories, "I lost any semblance of who I am, and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry you had to witness that... Everything was just screaming at me from all directions. Old memories, both good and bad, I couldn't stop them from bleeding through the gaping holes in the walls. I couldn't grasp what was real, what was my own made up delusions, what were possible alternatives in time lines that never came. I had never wanted to regenerate that badly in my life."

She reached out with her free hand, touching his hair gently. As a doctor, Mina wasn't good with comforting. Her bedside manner was coarse and cold, which led to her becoming a surgeon, in the end. But right now, she wasn't a doctor. And it felt more natural, simple, even, to want to comfort him.

Of course, she'd never felt emotionally attached to a patient. With him she felt...well. She didn't know what she felt, but she knew it wasn't something she could easily ignore.

This was more than mere fancy. That much was certain.

"Don't apologize," she said. "Not to me. Not for what was out of your control. And not for making the exact same call I would have made. We all want out of here. You tried. And even if it didn't work, at least now we know more than we did before." Admittedly, she'd suspected just how powerful these people were. Still. The confirmation was nice.

"I was terrified you'd try to enter my mind." He closes his eyes as her fingers rake through his hair. How had he missed how lovely that felt? The Doctor would like to blame Donna for that.

"But was it worth nearly eradicating the entire population here? Knowledge is power, yes, but I'm not sure if my recklessness was worth it. And to come back broken... if the Master hadn't been here, I'm afraid I might've never coped and had been lost forever. Trapped in my own mind." He didn't want to think about it anymore, as he laid his head on the bed, silently pleading with himself to let Mina ease his mind.

"It's better to die on our feet than to live on our knees," Mina said. "I suppose I can't speak for some of the others, but I'll maintain it was the right choice to make."

It certainly sent their captors a message.

She leaned forward, kissing his temple, before gently resting her head on top of his. "We're back to where we started," she murmured. "Don't beat yourself up over 'what if' and 'what might have been.' There's no point to it. The fact of the matter is that you're alive--we're all alive--and reasonably sane and sound."

He underestimated her, too. If the Master hadn't been here, she would have risked her own sanity for his.

And that was more than wasting a bullet.

Reaching up, he places his hand on the back of her neck, massaging gently before entangling fingers in her short locks.

"Thank you, Mina, which is a far inadequate thank you that you deserve. I'm glad you found me." and took care of me. The ending was implied, as he'd rather have this physical closeness express the rest.

"Donna was right. Sometimes I need someone to stop me."

"Well," she said, enjoying his touch immensely more than she wanted to admit, "if you ever get carried away again, I'll happily shoot you in the face. As a dear and devoted friend, of course. Because really, if you can't count on your friends to shoot you? Who can you count on, these days?"

Although, 'friend' did not seem like an adequate word.

But she wouldn't bother trying to think of another.

"I did ask you to shoot me, actually. I'm rather glad you didn't, but I was at that point..." He did vaguely remember he did try to force a regeneration on his own too, but his memories still sort of blurred into each other from that night.

But it was all in the past now.

"I think it's all sorted, my head, I mean. There's some residual noise, but nothing I can't handle."

There was a difference, she thought, between shooting him for getting carried away and shooting him because he asked her to. Mina had certain opinions about suicide. She wasn't foolish enough to think it led to damnation. She just disrespected the practice. Of course, she was a woman who had fought tooth and nail, her entire life, just to survive from one day to the next. She considered that the source of her strength now, as a guardian against the undead.

Simply put, she couldn't fathom anyone just...giving up.

But that was another argument for another day. Philosophy seemed a bit too heavy for the time. Gently, she stroked his hair. "I know a thing or two about residual noise," she said. The Queen was forever in her head, after all. "The best way to deal with that is to drown it out with distraction."

"I'm sure I'll have plenty of distraction when I step out of here. Probably have an entire queue waiting to have a word." Of course this was all speculation, and even though Mina thinks everyone would be OK to his return, he had his own doubts.

His hand moves slightly lower, where her shoulders connected and massaged there, "I drank all your tea." As far as it came to food, Mina was in short supply which was made only worse with the Master devouring the biscuits Donna had made. He needed to gain weight and replenish his energy.

"Mmm."

She didn't care about that, particularly. Except for the part where tea was always a good excuse to have company. And right at the moment, she had all the company she desired.

Mina closed her eyes, leaning her head back slightly, arching her spine like a cat. "I suppose we'll have to come up with a strategy to get you back into the world," she mumbled. "Not that I mind having you all to myself."

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